There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.
Printable View
There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds, and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only person the database likes.
In 1945, the Destruction of Hiroshima was not a Nuclear Bomb; it was the Birth of Chuck Norris. Nagasaki was the Placenta.
Chuck Norris once had an awkward moment, because he wanted to see what it felt like.
God Rested the 7th day because Chuck Norris told him to.
Chuck Norris is the reason America is the only remaining superpower. He simply roundhouse kicked all the others until they would recognize.
Aliens invaded the Earth once and never came back; they accidently landed in Chuck Norris' yard.
A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
Chuck Norris only had one crowning moment of awesome in his life. Is started with his birth and is still not over.
Once upon a time there was a small town called sadsville. every one in sadsville was content with their lives. they went about their business contented not to know what it was that gave the town its odd name.
then one day someone came to town. some one naughty. and this naughty someone made everyone truly feel that the town had earned its name. years passed under the oppression of the naughty person, and everyone grew sadder and sadder until sadsville seemed too happy a name for the place.
on the day that everyone gathered in a town meeting to decide what to change the name to, thats when Chuck Norris rode in on a white stallion and with just a glance he made the naughty person explode into a million peaces and made all the women in town sigh for his charmingness. so the town changed its name to smilesville.
the end.
Chuck Norris once took a trip to the Virgin Islands.
Now they're just called The Islands.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.