I've been a mod for about 7 months now, been around since the beginning, you're right!
I know a lot of the times I myself have had no responses from the contact us page, or the automated responses as well. There are some "I hate evony" threads active and untouched, for instance:
http://bbs.evony.com/showthread.php?t=79831
http://bbs.evony.com/showthread.php?t=81736
Just a couple I grabbed as examples from threads I mod. We see "I love you Evony" and "I hate you Evony" every day.
Basically, I'm not saying people can't get lost in the shuffle, but frankly, if I close a thread that you think I was wrong about, I'd prefer to get a message so I can at least hear you out on it.
I've reversed warning/infractions and re-opened posts I closed a few times because I saw the other side of the argument and agreed I was wrong. I'd prefer to know. If I was abusing my power in any way, I should be told off by the admins or lose my volunteer position.
I can't speak for everyone (mod, dev, or admin) regarding replies but if someone is not responding to you I say bring it to the next mod, and higher up until you get a response, these are your forums and if you feel something specific is unfair, make your case!
The problem with doing it publicly is yes, it gets out of hand, and yes, Evony can decide to remove/merge/infract/ban if they beleive someone crossed the line, but it works both ways! Even mods are fallable, and SHOULD be given personal feedback from you guys to better improve how we act as moderators.
Sorry a bit of a rant, and I get what you're saying about the feeling of unfairness, you have every right to feel that way! I'm just trying to help - saying lets be proactive and not reactive, and if you think I'm doing a terrible job, tell me! (I'm using me but I mean every mod) I've made mistakes but when people come to me with an honest argument whether I agree with it or not, I do take it to heart. I shouldn't be here if didn't.