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Thread: Bible Quotes that you better not take literally

  1. #1
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    Default Bible Quotes that you better not take literally

    Deuteronomy 14:9-10; 13; 20-21
    9 These ye shall eat of all that are in the waters: all that have fins and scales shall ye eat:
    10 And whatsoever hath not fins and scales ye may not eat; it is unclean unto you.
    13 If a man also lie with man-kind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.
    20 And they shall say onto the elders of his city. This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard.
    21 And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die
    (Frog legs make you unclean)(God wants you to kill homosexuals)(If you are Fat I can throw rocks at you)

    Deuteronomy 7:2
    2 And when the LORD your God has delivered them [enemies in war] over to you and you have defeated them, then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them, and show them no mercy.
    (Take that IRAQIS)

    Deuteronomy 22:20-21
    20 If, however, the charge is true and no proof of the girl's virginity can be found,
    21 she shall be brought to the door of her father's house and there the men of her town shall stone her to death. She has done a disgraceful thing in Israel by being promiscuous while still in her father's house. You must purge the evil from among you.
    (Sorry ladies if you live with Daddy you better keep it under lock and key)

    Leviticus 20:9-10
    9 If anyone curses his father or mother, he must be put to death. He has cursed his father or his mother, and his blood will be on his own head.
    10 If a man commits adultery with another man's wife (with the wife of his neighbor) both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death.
    (Remember that time you called your mom a B-word behind her back? Yeah you're due for a stoning.)(That show Cheater's has been doing it wrong)

    How can these concepts be explained in this day and age?

  2. #2
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    They fail. End of story.

    But seriously, you have it right by calling them "quotes you shouldn't take literally." I think that the whole Bible thing is just plain outdated. It served to keep people in line once, but now we have other institutions to do it.

    And by the way, I notice that while on eof the quotes says something against a man "lying with another man," it doesn't actally say anything against lesbians... A loophole? Take that fundamentalists!
    Last edited by Bree Fletcher; 07-07-2010 at 10:07 PM.


    That kind old lady stopped the rain for us.
    She said it would only make us cold, and miserable, and sick.
    We thanked her and hugged her and she walked away smiling warmly.
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  3. #3
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    I want to make it clear that while I will allow discussions of religion in this forum, I will not allow BASHING of religions. We're walking a really fine line here with many of these posts *coughNesteruscough* and I don't want to have to either start ejecting people already or worse...close the forum entirely.

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    Foxy you always know how to save me from myself


    I didnt want to come across as bashing the bible rather questioning all the very very outdated messages that it conveys and there are many many many more verses similar to these

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    I'll agree with that. Look at how old the Bible is! Whether you believe it to be the divine word of God or not, you have to admit it is one of the oldest set of writings in existence. And a whole heck of a lot of it reads like old English midwyfery manuals, full of common sense.

    People used to cook over open fires, instead of in ovens or frying pans. It can be hard to cook something thoroughly that way. Pork is almost always full of worms and dangerous bacteria that can kill humans. The only way to ensure it is safe is to keep it frozen or refrigerated from butcher to stove, and then to cook it thoroughly. Back then, they figured out that pork cooked over a fire kills. New rule: Thou shalt not eat pork. Nowadays, if you have a refrigerator and a stove and maybe even a good meat thermometer, you're good to go so it just doesn't apply.

    The Bible is so chock-full of stuff like this, and if you try to apply it to life today then you are really sort of missing the point. Had the Bible been written today, I think a lot of the rules would be very different. The Ten Commandments wouldn't change much, I bet, but instead of saying not to eat pork, it would remind everyone to cover their nose and mouth when they sneeze and to wash their hands frequently. And instead of the whole virginity thing, it would say that you shouldn't let your children surf the internet unsupervised.

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    I see you disabled your PMs Foxy and I already know why

    Wondered if you still used the same skype ID

  7. #7
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    Hmm this is interesting, and actually I can agree with you.

    The Bible is out dated, and there is a reason we have both the Old Testament, and the New Testament, and there is a reason why there is a progressive christian movement. If you follow along in the Bible you will notice there are places where, (Sticking too Christianity as the religion) God, contradicts him/her/self. I think though that the Bible is more like a starting point, center yourself around these core beliefs, and you'll be fine.

    Everything is subject to change, even omnipotent, omniscient beings.

    ~L

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