Bullying- An Opinion

[Oro]

Ok let me start off by saying I am a high school freshman who is quite nerdy and sometimes socially awkward .

I agree that bullying needs to be defined because whenever the teacher gives a lecture on bullying EVERYONE looks guilty, including myself. By the end of lectures like that we are all convinced we are bullies and make an effort to be nicer for about 5 minutes and then forget about everything because we have the attention span of fleas but I digress. You would think that me being a nerdy and socially awkward kid would get bullied a lot? right? Well I don't. I have never been in a fight, yes I do have a insulting remark directed at me every once in a while but nothing serious. I have also never known someone who has truly been bullied, the cliche stuff about stuffing into lockers, chasing down after school, forcing to do work, etc. does not happen. Maybe it did long time ago but it no longer does, right now if someone is in the office for bullying they have said something mean or bumped into someone rather too roughly. I am sorry if there are some real serious bullying cases out there but right now the only people that go complaining to parents or teachers are overreacting or extremely insecure and fragile. Bullying right now is fine the way it is, it is a inevitable result of a large group of people with many different likes, dislikes, appearances, physical abilities, and intellectual abilities being put into small rooms for 6 hours a day. A perfect society in my opinion is not where no one is ever insulted but where people are insulted but they don't take it too seriously and move on.

[Emma6]

the mean problem with bullying is that the school board dosen't know how to deliver disicplne. One hundred years ago if this happened, the teacher would take a ruler and the kid would be a better kid by remebering that whipping. In modern days however, bullies are given a "detention" that consists on sitting quietly in a room after school doing homework that they would be doing anyway. I am a Youth Leader at my local church and a lot of kids there who cheat on tests in school, bully others, and fail classes do it because there is no threat of punishment. Sure, you can go home with a letter to your parents, but some parents simply dont care.

When these kids enter university the enitre scope changes. My husband works for a university as a provost of students and registar, basically meaning if they do something bad he is the one that they will see. If you cheat on a test, you're out for a year and you get a mark on your record that every recruiter will see when you try to enter a different school. Copying others work? You will get thrown out faster then a wink.

Modern elementry, middle, and high schools don't prepare their kids for this.

They need to.

[Arathorn136]

If you want critique on your arguement, well, I suppose you should establish an argument. I am confused as to whether you are trying to argue that bullying is everywhere, widespread, (and so what? You simply established the point, did not analyze the point very well), whether bullying is a good thing or not, or whether you are trying to simply define bullying. Either way, all of these points are very disorganized. You randomly put in things and it seems to me as if you are simply rambling and ranting about bullying.

If this is simply an expository, more or less explaining what bullying is, where it is, etc., you do in fact need to address the effects of bullying more thoroughly.
Also, is the last sentence of your intro a thesis? If you attempted to make an implied thesis, you failed, if the last sentence is your thesis (it seems the only definitive argument in the intro paragraph), you completely veered off course as far as arguing your point goes.
If you decided not to have a thesis, well, that was a bad decision because it makes your essay lack direction and focus, leading readers to think it was pointless rambling they could have come up with themselves.

I really liked the unique point you brought up about teachers and bullying. But, as with many of your points, it made me want to say, "So what?"
Analyze, analyze, analyze!

My main issue is organization and direction. Your essay lacks both. Although, your syntax structure is pretty varied and you have few mechanical errors, so that's good!
I do want to make one more comment about your style. Your essay seems a bit forced, you are trying to show an intellectual style without having chosen a direction. I've told people before, find your direction, then find your voice. Your tone will come out more clearly.

I don't often use outlines but I suggest you make one.

What I am actually trying to do here is a "letter to the editor" sort of thing. I think what may have screwed it up was that I had essay format in the back of my mind, so when I wrote it I'm thinking "intro, body, conclusion", not "short opinionated viewpoint". I didn't mean for it to be like an essay, but at the same time I wanted it to be a little more structured. As for sounding over intellectual, that may be because of two things... The fact that if someone sounds smart in a paper, occasionally a large part of the population will believe what that someone has to say, and also because when I write formal stuff it tends to be a little over done sometimes.

I thank everyone for their opinions and critiques.

[Oro]

the mean problem with bullying is that the school board dosen't know how to deliver disicplne. One hundred years ago if this happened, the teacher would take a ruler and the kid would be a better kid by remebering that whipping. In modern days however, bullies are given a "detention" that consists on sitting quietly in a room after school doing homework that they would be doing anyway. I am a Youth Leader at my local church and a lot of kids there who cheat on tests in school, bully others, and fail classes do it because there is no threat of punishment. Sure, you can go home with a letter to your parents, but some parents simply dont care.

When these kids enter university the enitre scope changes. My husband works for a university as a provost of students and registar, basically meaning if they do something bad he is the one that they will see. If you cheat on a test, you're out for a year and you get a mark on your record that every recruiter will see when you try to enter a different school. Copying others work? You will get thrown out faster then a wink.

Modern elementry, middle, and high schools don't prepare their kids for this.

They need to.

The punishments aren't the problem and kids like me get tired of parents blaming it on the new less abusive educational system. I don't want to get into how much crime there was 100 years ago but lets just say we are doing pretty good these days. A true bullying case in schools these days is about as common as a guy with drugs in school, it happens but its quite rare. Most things that are claimed to be bullying in schools now are just natural things bound to happen in large groups of people.

[Emma6]

it is not natrul for a person just to go beat up on someone else and the vast majoirty of passer-bys doing nothing about it

[Lazzzzzzzzalicious!]

idk about the dictionary definition, but to me bullying is treating someone differently in a negative because of how they act, look, speak etc. Someone who is what society considers "strange" or "annoying".

I've been on both ends, to me it's a terrible part of society, but one that I don't see ever being resolved. Children's brains are still developing. In elementary school, we know the difference between right and wrong, but does a child really understand the impact that their teasing can have on another child? Prolly not. In middle school & high school we know the difference between right & wrong, and most would know the impact it has but the mindset becomes something of the "better him/her then me". It's a very kill or be killed environment. In college it starts to change in the sense that you don't need to be around everyone every day. You can pick your group of friends and not have to be near any jerkoff who is giving you trouble. But still it happens, whether at partys or other types of things. They say our brains aren't finished developing until we turn 25

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To respond to the teachers part in bullying or not bullying I think the term bully is incorrect in the situation. A teacher who turns a blind eye to bullying is being neglectful. A teacher who snaps at a student for misbehaving is being rude & maybe inappropriate. I believe it's a teachers responsibility (at least in high school & under) to take the initiative to get to the bottom of a problem rather then just attempt to dish out consequences to the individual problems. In college I believe it's the students job to take initiative when help is needed.
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Finally, I agree with Bole that bullying is a cancer to society. Similar to cancer, there seems to be no cure. You can ground a kid, and do all kinds of consequences as you see fit, but until they see the wrongness of their actions for themselves it wont make much of a difference to them.

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mmk rant over

[desk]

I don't know what the exact definition of bullying is, though I'm sure that is a very important point, but I would like to offer an argument as to why bullying occurs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature...tNwXTRQ#t=396s

The response is only like 2 minutes long but I think it pretty much summarizes what my point of view on this particular topic.

[Oro]

it is not natrul for a person just to go beat up on someone else and the vast majoirty of passer-bys doing nothing about it

If you had read any of my posts you would know that doesn't happen, things are far more complex than that. But the cliche opinion of what bullying is pretty much BS.

[cushseth]

The punishments aren't the problem and kids like me get tired of parents blaming it on the new less abusive educational system. I don't want to get into how much crime there was 100 years ago but lets just say we are doing pretty good these days. A true bullying case in schools these days is about as common as a guy with drugs in school, it happens but its quite rare. Most things that are claimed to be bullying in schools now are just natural things bound to happen in large groups of people.

Then you didnt go to my school, hehe. Every other guy had weed for sale. Bullying wasnt very prevelent in any of my schools growing up, I don't recall it ever happening too often.

[Furrr]

Then you didnt go to my school, hehe. Every other guy had weed for sale. Bullying wasnt very prevelent in any of my schools growing up, I don't recall it ever happening too often.

All schools in different areas are different, with different people, some are more prone to bullying or the use of drugs, it all depends.

My school, is more like yours, cushseth.
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Also, a more abusive education system wouldn't solve anything, it would just mean that the bullying was done in a more clever, crafty way, making it less detectable to subtly intervene into a delicate situation. A more abusive education system would also equal the bullies feeling more concerned about getting caught, meaning they're more likely to take preventive measures that could cause more harm to the victim, and other people.