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Thread: Jokes

  1. #1

    Default I need jokes

    I haven't heard any good jikes in a while. Lately i've heard things like "Your mom is so stupid she kept saying am not to R2" or "Your mom is so stupid she thought Jar-Jar came with Pickles-Pickles" Really? STAR WARS JOKES? I've heard people tell me them a million times, and they just got them from Robot Chicken (which you should watch. It's in cartton networks adult swim. Kiddies stay away.)
    If live and let live doesn't work, KILL THEM ALL AND LET GOD SORT THEM OUT.

    Currently going insane.

  2. #2

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ransenken123 View Post
    I haven't heard any good jikes in a while. Lately i've heard things like "Your mom is so stupid she kept saying am not to R2" or "Your mom is so stupid she thought Jar-Jar came with Pickles-Pickles" Really? STAR WARS JOKES? I've heard people tell me them a million times, and they just got them from Robot Chicken (which you should watch. It's in cartton networks adult swim. Kiddies stay away.)
    K.

    What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

    Nothing you haven't already told her twice

  3. #3

    Exclamation You'll like this one

    What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Cardiff?


    A leisure centre


    lol

  4. Default

    What do you tell the Civony-"creators"?

    They stole the graphics!

    Nah but seriously:
    "Imagine you have an uncle named Jack. And he was sitting on an elephant, and he couldn't get off by himself. Would you help your uncle jack off an elephant?"

    (If you don't see it right away, keep looking)

  5. #5

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by This_Is_Age_Of_Empires View Post
    What do you tell the Civony-"creators"?

    They stole the graphics!

    Nah but seriously:
    "Imagine you have an uncle named Jack. And he was sitting on an elephant, and he couldn't get off by himself. Would you help your uncle jack off an elephant?"

    (If you don't see it right away, keep looking)
    Wow, I didn't get that for days. I AM slow.

  6. #6

    Default

    A large, powerfully-built guy meets a woman at a bar. After a number of drinks, they agree to go back to his place. As they are making out in the bedroom, he stands up and starts to undress.
    After he takes his shirt off, he flexes his muscular arms and says, "See that, baby? That''s 1000 pounds of dynamite!" She begins to drool.
    The man drops his pants, strikes a bodybuilder''s pose, and says, referring to his bulging thighs, "See those, baby? That''s 1000 pounds of dynamite!" She is aching for action at this point.
    Finally, he drops his underpants, and after a quick glance, she grabs her purse and runs screaming to the front door.
    He catches her before she is able to leave and asks, "Why are you in such a hurry to go?"
    She replies, "With 2000 pounds of dynamite and such a short fuse, I was afraid you were about to blow!"

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    3,030

    Default

    The French prime minister is talking to a British officer.

    The Frenchie says "Why do you all wear red coats? It makes it easy for my troops to shoot you."

    The Brit says "With this coat, if I am wounded, my men will not see it and they will not be frightened."

    The Frenchie says "That's a great idea! I think my army would benefit from this system too. From now on, all French officers will wear brown pants."



    Join the Red Army now!

    LONG LIFE TO COMMISSAR KITTEN!!!

  8. #8

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Zenrax View Post
    The French prime minister is talking to a British officer.

    The Frenchie says "Why do you all wear red coats? It makes it easy for my troops to shoot you."

    The Brit says "With this coat, if I am wounded, my men will not see it and they will not be frightened."

    The Frenchie says "That's a great idea! I think my army would benefit from this system too. From now on, all French officers will wear brown pants."
    Priceless..
    "A good player plays where the puck is; a great player plays where the puck is going to be."

    -Wayne Gretzky

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Merry Olde England
    Posts
    48

    Default

    a few bad jokes for you

    What time do you go to the dentist?

    2:30

    How do you make lady Gaga mad?

    Poker face


    How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

    We still dont know there still trying to work it out

    Hope that brings a smile lol

    ~Crag
    Bow Chicka Bow Wow

  10. #10

    Default

    why did the football manager flood the pitch? so he could bring on his subs

    why did skeleton not go to the party? he had no body to go with

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