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Thread: This REALLY happened in my mail!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    Barksdale AFB, LA
    Posts
    16

    Talking This REALLY happened in my mail!

    Ok, so this is my very first post, but it shall be a great one!

    Alright, I don't want to toot my own horn or anything like that, but I'm not a small guy in my area (I'm no superpower either), so I, just like all of you, find some people around me that are 'fat' and not growing very quickly or even at all. I attack them once a week, sometimes twice (I'm not Ivan the Terrible and attack 50 billion times in one day seven days a week) just to hit them, take their stuff and let them recover. If the person mails me and says, "hey stop... that's not cool man.." I 9 and a half times out of 10 will [completely on how it's worded]...
    This brings me to some incredibly amusing mails I got from one of my locals! Now, I'm just going to copy and paste, editing nothing, just for your viewing pleasure!!

    To: Hobgoblin
    From: Kuan-Ti
    Subject: Good Show Mate
    Time: 05/31 22:40:01
    You did a great job, kicking the door down on this low level player. Why is it alwasy the players like you with high levels, big armies, lots of prestige and (ahem) 'honor', that constantly pick on the undefended little players that struggle to get one step up? Cant you find someone more your size to beat up?

    That was the first I got. I left him be for a full month! I honestly forgot about his mail (I get a lot of mail because I am a Vice Host of a very prominate alliance in the area so I didn't see this one anymore)... but I digress, here is the rest of it:

    Subject: the end
    Time: 06/30 20:57:04
    I am not your private bank for you to plunder every few days. We are not at war. In RL my business is public advertising and so... If you plunder me again, I will set up a public smear campaign against your name(s) and let everyone online know you for the thieving oversized bully you are (and so on). And yes I have a few teleporters so I can move a lot and you will still be smeared...(a lot and often)

    I figured, hey publicity for me!! YAY!! FEAR THE NAME HOBGOBLIN!!! ROAR!!! lol and I got this:

    Subject: the test
    Time: 07/01 07:56:52
    You could not resist testing me? Good luck with your new public persona, really, your name(s) will be knwn as garbage for a long time to come.

    "So I replied to this one... thought it would be fun to throw false scare tactics back at him...
    Well, "sir" I work for the US Government and it won't be hard to find out who you are with your IP address that I already have. Spread such "nasty rumors" about me and I will sue you for Libel! So let that soak in you pathetic, loser. OR you could just grow and and take the breaks of the game and quick crying like a pansy, little girl.

    Hobgoblin The Great"

    I really do work for the US Government, just in the Air Force, nothing CIA or FBI or anything like that...

    Well, I spoke of this to the host of my alliance. HE got a mail about me as well, so I was told to either bring him into the alliance or destory him... easy enough, I sent this:

    "I am informing you of your 'Test'. You can join any of the *** Alliances, you can leave ******* and never return to these borders, or you can die. It's completely up to you. Choose wisely because it will effect the rest of your gaming time in Evony."

    (Ok so I edited out what alliance and region I'm in... I'm sure that there is someone out there who is all about Noob rights and will come to my door being a zealot for the cause, or something crazy like that...)

    This is the responce I get:
    Subject: Do your worst
    Time: 07/01 23:04:48
    Wow, your a complete idiot arent you? I have noticed in these types of games theres always a bullying jerklike you to make the game ****. No wonder our goverment is in such dire straights as its being run by dumbasses. Heres what I am going to do, ...since you insist on being yourself as a dingleberry and tearing my place down no matter what I do at this point, your gonna be smeared all over. for me, this game is over, but for you its a whole new world as I post your exploits for all to see

    Followed promptly by this:
    Subject: Setting up for you
    Time: 07/01 23:19:20
    I want you to know of the lenghts I am going to get to you. 1). I sent your e-mails ( as you say you work for the gov't and can cheat at will) to the admins and requested a looksee at you. 2.) I am shutting down my gameplay so you can strip whatever you want. 3. My work is advertising as I said, so I am preparing a (anti) marketing program for Hobgoblin and Hobgoblin2.
    I do not like bullies, theives or cheaters. Thanks for ruining the game for me and who knows how many others

    This is where he showed just how ignorant he really is... I name my heros after my name, so my heros are Hobgoblin, Hobgoblin1, Hobgoblin2, ect. down the line. This guy is thinking that they are seperate accounts!! Also, how many times must he point out that he is in marketing? I mean, I love my job, I load bombs, missiles, and rockets (oh my) on Aircraft for a living but I don't send it in emails to everybody more than once...

    So, to summarize:
    This guy got REALLY mad at me for playing the game. How would anyone progress if they never attacked anyone? Besides, wouldn't that make this a boring game?

    So if anyone knows a game where everyone sings and dances under rainbows, they plant flowers that have faces and sing too, they ride unicorns, and everyone holds hands cause they are all friends and never attack anyone... PLEASE direct Kuan-Ti to this place, cause that is the game for him!

    Sorry this was long winded... but I had to share...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    56

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    LOL thats great.

  3. #3

    Default

    lol

    we all went through that (except for the people who started early)

    i did for a while,
    i just teleported away

    didn't make that big a deal out of it

    can't wait to see this 'marketing program' of his
    :P

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2009
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    Barksdale AFB, LA
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    I'm expecting to see a billboard or a commercial on tv or something slipped into a magazine!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Location
    BFE IL, Middle of a dayum cornfield
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hobgoblin View Post
    Subject: the end
    Time: 06/30 20:57:04
    I am not your private bank for you to plunder every few days. We are not at war. In RL my business is public advertising and so... If you plunder me again, I will set up a public smear campaign against your name(s) and let everyone online know you for the thieving oversized bully you are (and so on). And yes I have a few teleporters so I can move a lot and you will still be smeared...(a lot and often)
    That was such a good letter! LOL. I love how these people take their jobs right into Evony.

    "I'm a lawyer, I'll sue your ass for damages."
    "I'm a cop, I'll find you and arrest you."
    "I'm a doctor, when you get to the hospital I'll refuse treatment."
    "I'm a social worker. I'll find you at your workplace and recommend your boss that you are highly unstable."
    "I'm a comic. I'll make sure have you in one of my bits to insult you on live TV!"

    The list can go on and on lol.

    Haha its funy if he puts some smear campaign on a player name like Hobgoblin. It'll be comical."

    "Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind" ~Einstein
    "lol well wine usually helps boost the wood"~LG
    "Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Heres Tom with the Weather."~Bill Hicks

  6. Default

    "I'm a lady of negotiable virtue...if I find you, you're *****"

  7. #7

    Default

    Haha, some people take the game too seriously. Take a look at the message i received for plundering one player. This guy really hates your presence.

    1st message:
    does it make you feel good to hit someone who had much less than you, make you feel like you actually have power on here? good job....you win the a-hole award

    2nd message:
    a couple hours, that means you sent pretty much all you had, which is sad when you have over 100k prestige...im not crying because im gonna restart this server and come after you....btw, my alliance members will be taking all you have shortly...and that makes me laugh, so have all the fun you want, because im starting over and coming after you


    So, now his goal in playing Evony is just to come after me. Don't understand why he would be starting over.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    New York
    Posts
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    lol so true all of you.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by legionreturns View Post
    "I'm a lady of negotiable virtue...if I find you, you're *****"

    OMG I lol'd so hard I think I peed a little

  10. #10
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    Jul 2009
    Location
    New York
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    56

    Default

    ewwwwwwwwwwwww

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