Sometimes... I wonder what it would be like to sit at my computer searching messageboards and forums so I could just flame away at complete strangers and non-corporeal entities.

Sometimes... I wish I had a "trout" button and when I clicked it an actual trout would pop out of someone's monitor and slap the taste out of their mouth.

Sometimes... I think if my name were Bruce I would wear black underwear and run around beating up imaginary "bad people."