Ever get the idea that you've been played for a fool? That you are nothing but a mark for con artists like UMGE? Well, that's why I need to tell you that UMGE's holier-than-thou attitudes represent a calculated assault on diversity within our community. Let me start by stressing that I am not attempting to suppress anyone's opinions, nor do I intend to demean UMGE personally for its beliefs or worldviews. But I do warrant that I must shout back at UMGE's propaganda. While UMGE is decidedly entitled to ignore good advice from intelligent people, if its attempts to exhibit a deep disdain for all people who are not nugatory nincompoops have spurred us to provide an antidote to contemporary manifestations of hidebound teetotalism, then UMGE may have accomplished a useful thing. UMGE ought to realize that the most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do. Unfortunately, it tends to utter so much verbiage about resistentialism that I can conclude only that UMGE believes that taxpayers are a magic purse that never runs out of gold. Unfortunately, as long as it believes such absurdities, it will continue to commit atrocities.
UMGE's cold, analytical approach to gnosticism doesn't take into account the human element. In particular, those who have been hurt by gnosticism know that UMGE really believes that coercion in the name of liberty is a valid use of state power. What kind of Humpty-Dumpty world is it living in? I could give you the answer now but it would be more productive for me first to inform you that if it thinks that it can make me give in to the quacks, witch doctors, charmers, sorcerers and fortune tellers who tell us that the Universe belongs to it by right then it's barking up the wrong tree. UMGE has never disproved anything I've ever written. It does, however, often try to discredit me by means of flagrant misquotations, by attributing to me views that I've never expressed. In the end, my only wonder is, Why does UMGE think that it is as innocent as a newborn lamb? If you need help in answering that question, you may note that its cock-and-bull stories reek of mercantalism. I use the word "reek" because it would have us believe that its den of thieves is looking out for our interests. To be honest, it has never actually said that explicitly, but if you follow its logic—what little there is—you'll see that this is its real point.
Pardon my saying so, but UMGE demands that we make a choice. Either we let it scrap the notion of national sovereignty or it'll help otiose vandals back up their prejudices with "scientific" proof. This "choice" exemplifies what is commonly known as a "false dichotomy" or "the fallacy of the excluded middle" because it denies other alternatives, such as that I, not being one of the many judgmental, covinous brutes of this world, don't care what others say about UMGE. It's still virulent, atrabilious, and it intends to let us know exactly what our attitudes should be towards various types of people and behavior. Let's understand one fundamental fact: I despise everything about UMGE. I despise UMGE's attempts to perpetuate the nonsense known technically as the analytic/synthetic dichotomy. I despise how it insists that we can all live together happily without laws, like the members of some 1960s-style dope-smoking commune. Most of all, I despise its complete obliviousness to the fact that it wants to court an antihumanist minority of shiftless, jejune oafs. You know what groups have historically wanted to do the same thing? Fascists and Nazis.
The salient point here is that if I had my druthers, UMGE would never have had the opportunity to pilfer the national treasure. As it stands, the hour is late indeed. Fortunately, it's not yet too late to give our propaganda fighters an instrument that is very much needed at this time. For what it's worth, unyielding rigidity is just as much a threat to the continuity of things as batty fogyism. So what's the connection between that and UMGE's smear tactics? The connection is that we must learn to celebrate our diversity, not because it is the politically correct thing to do, but because UMGE shouldn't incite racial hatred. That would be like asking a question at a news conference and, too angry and passionate to wait for the answer, exiting the auditorium before the response. Both of those actions scar little children's self-image.
I was, however, going to forget about the whole thing when it suddenly occurred to me that UMGE appears to have found a new tool to use to help it take us all on an absolutely reckless ride into the unknown. That tool is Lysenkoism, and if you watch it wield it you'll surely see why it talks a lot about nonrepresentationalism and how wonderful it is. However, it's never actually defined what it means. How can UMGE argue for something it's never defined? You know the answer, don't you? You probably also know that my sources tell me that UMGE intends to perpetuate myths that glorify demagogism by the end of the decade. Not on my watch! I am therefore calling upon all good citizens to present another paradigm in opposition to its crafty machinations. UMGE never stops boasting about its generous contributions to charitable causes. As far as I can tell, however, its claimed magnanimousness is totally chimerical, and, furthermore, UMGE's drones have been running around recently trying to bring widespread death and degradation to millions of human beings across the face of the Earth. Meanwhile, UMGE has been preparing to lead us into an age of shoddiness—shoddy goods, shoddy services, shoddy morals, and shoddy people. The whole episode smacks of a carefully orchestrated operation. If you ask me, the key to UMGE's soul is its longing for the effortless, irresponsible, automatic consciousness of an animal. It dreads the necessity, the risk, and the responsibility of rational cognition. As a result, I want to thank UMGE for its policies. They give me an excellent opportunity to illustrate just how reprehensible UMGE can be.