Tell Us who you are what you do (While ranting about all the stuff youve done)

Example:

I am Lord Haart The Great and Mighty.
I appear in other games as a major character in the story!(maybe a minor one :P)
I Have tamed the wildest horses to be found in Tuscany!
I Have squashed others to pieces in my quest for glory!
(it doesent all have to be real :P)